Life

Most sinful is to break a heart filled with love

Image March 31, 2016 jcisnowjs 5 Comments

I enjoy understanding human emotions, trying to feel what another person is feeling, why there are doing something, what is behind their every action. When I started reading(Tarot) it gave me another opportunity to do that. But over the time it has become painful. It is hard when you see someone in pain, and stay objective. To not react. To not feel. It aches. I am writing today in this ache. It will not help others but it may soothe my heart a bit.

I believe in the saying that Life is Beautiful. But, now I have understood that this saying is incomplete. Life is beautiful, but this beauty is hidden to those who are not brave enough to deal with its ugliness first. To feel the rose in your hand, you have to be poked by thorns first. Irony is that what makes this life worth living also make it a living hell, and that is Love.

80% of the problems that I have answered till now are based on Relationships. Some problems are between spouses, some due to In Laws, some from co-workers too, and some are two people in love trying to be together against their very own blood relations.

This just breaks my heart, to see your very own parents trying to break heart of their kids, just because their culture did not approve of love marriages. Seriously, Indian parents do need to grow up.

In other countries(developed), at least lovers only have to focus on if the other person is right or wrong for them. In India, No, this is not enough. That other person should be right for me, and my Parents, My siblings, my doggy, my aunties, my nephews, my neighbors, and my neighbors doggy too. If not, well love is another thing but you can not get married. Even if you manage to pick a suitable candidate that can fit on every standard set by your family and relatives; even then his/her character must be bad, otherwise why would they have fallen in love.

Most surprisingly, parents of a boy, always feel that their son is so good and noble; it is that characterless girl who is trying to seduce the poor boy. Their son is an avatar of Shri Raam, while that girl must be Shuparnakha or some other demon. In one moment you become characterless if you love someone before marriage.

While, on the girl side; girl has obviously lost her character and ‘Maryada’. She has brought dishonor to the whole family, and the boy, who she loves. He must be a ‘sadak-chaap, ‘awara’, who want only one thing from our daughter – Sex. Yes, sex is the only possible reason, on why someone could love your daughter.

No matter how perfect both of them could be for each other, just because they love each other, their marriage is doomed to fail. Because it is only arranged marriage which can survive the test of time. So if you will do an arranged marriage, we will get you a gaon ki seedhi saadi ladki, who will cook for you, will sleep with you without saying no ever, will do your laundry, clean your home, and also give birth to your offspring, your vansh. What we are not telling you is that she can never be your soulmate. She will be a maid for you, and you will pay her in regular expensive saarees, jewelry, and a daily dose of nagging too. She will not be the one with whom you can share your joy and sorrows. She will not be the one who has your heart. Who has loved you more than anything else in this world. She will be a wife to you, a mother to your kids, a bahu to your parents, but she will never be your soulmate, because your soul died the very same day when you left that girl, who was still holding your broken heart while you were busy crushing hers.

It does not matter if you are a boy or a girl, or parent of one; who is in love. Do understand one thing. There is no greater pain than a broken heart. There is not a greater curse than the one which came from a broken heart. A single tear from a broken heart can make your life disintegrate into a million pieces. Never break a heart. No matter how much you want your kids to follow in your footstep or respect your culture. This pain is not worth it. Don’t give this pain to anyone. Your kids respect you enough to wait for your acceptance. Do not lose their respect because of your worthless Ego.

Never break a heart filled with love. It may never learn to love again. What could be the greatest sin than that?

Kids and Me

Otu and Renne’s 4th Birthday

Video March 6, 2016 jcisnowjs Leave a comment

It’s late by a week and a day… but better late than never. So, here is the video of 4th Birthday of my sons, Otu and Renne.

Happy Birthday kiddos.

Kids and Me

You are just a Mom

Image February 18, 2016 jcisnowjs 2 Comments

Phew! I am writing after a very long time. Well, I was writing a lot of other stuff, but it’s been long since I wrote on my blog. Feeling a little jittery here.

Bear with me if you find any faults… just treat is as my first post… which most of you didn’t read actually 😦 Now, I am feeling bad.

Let me leave all these silly thoughts behind and directly come to the point.

As you read the title of this post, ‘You are just a Mom’, you will realize that this is also one of many posts about my kids. Yes, it is. What can I do, I have nothing else to write other than my silly conversations with my kids.

So, it so happen that Renne, my youngest, he likes to watch cartoon, just like the other two. Only thing, he likes to watch it from up close. If I am not near, watching him, constantly, as I love to do; he will be there just in front of TV within minutes. It is like every 10 minutes I have to peek from my kitchen to check on him. He never disappoint me. He is always near it, and as soon as he will hear me coming, he will jump and run towards couch in the same speed as flash, his superhero would do.

I have a very nice and soothing yelling voice, my kids and hubby won’t agree to it, but even my nightingale voice have a limit. So, instead I prefer giving them time out.

With Renne situation too, when I got tired of telling him again and again to watch TV from distance, I gave him a time out of 10 minutes.

Now, you must think how heartless I am, depriving my kid of watching cartoon for full 10 minutes. Yes, I am cruel, and you are not the only one who thinks this way.

Renne started crying, but he had no other choice, so the defeated soldier retreated to his time out zone.

When someone is in trouble, who came for rescue – Knight in shining armor.

In Renne case, it is his big brother, Otu.

To freshen your memory, Otu is just 1 minute elder to Renne. Both are twins. But Otu feel that 1 minute is enough to make him guardian of Renne. In fact he says that Renne is his baby, and not mine. Parenting is not that easy kiddo.

So, Otu Singh, came to rescue. Seeing his baby brother crying and not been able to watch cartoon, he came in kitchen to face me, with his hands on sides, just like a boss ready to confront his worst employee.

Otu: Why you punish my Renne?

Me: Because he was not watching TV from a distance.

Otu: You are just a MOM.

Otu: He is my baby. You can not punish him. Tell you that – You are just a mom.

Me: I am a Mom, and I can do anything.

Otu: No. Moms can not punish their kids. Moms only love kids. They don’t make kids cry. You can not punish him. He is my baby.

Ok, by now, I was speechless, and convinced too, that I am just a Mom.

A Mom of three kids, who are courageous enough to fight with the supreme leader of home (me), for the sake of each other.

Happy to be ‘Just a Mom’. 😛

Life, Spiritual

Chakra Meditation

Image January 21, 2016 jcisnowjs 2 Comments

We are fooled by the term Yoga(Yog). We do Surya Namaskar and say we have done Yoga. We will do kapaalbhati, Praanayam, a few OMs and we will start preaching ourselves as Yoga Guru.There is nothing wrong in doing all these, but to term them as Yog is like ignoring the big picture. Pardon me for using the term Yog and not Yoga, I just prefer it as this is more apt to its hindi nomenclature, like it is Lord Raam and not Lord Rama. I don’t want to pronounce it Yo-Ga. It is Yog.

Yog in simple plain hindi means – To Add, To Sum,To Join.

It is the Yog of us with our spiritual being. Joining of body with mind and soul.

Yoga, however is the most popularized version of physical exercises which are teachings of Yog, to make your body apt for meditation. Only a healthy body can have a healthy mind; and only a healthy mind can have a healthy soul. This is the basis of Yog. We use Pranaayam, and other type of Yogic exercises to make our body fit. Meditation is used to make our mind distraction free and focused, so we can receive the knowledge of beyond. When this is reached, Yog helps us to reach our highest spiritual self. To be one with The One. This joining of trinity. Mind + Body +Soul.

There are so many ways to practice Yog in your life, like Hath Yog,Raaj Yog, Tantra, Mantra, Gyan, Karm. One of them is Kundalini Yog, which involves almost everything from breathing exercises to mantras, to meditation. Kundalini enlightenment works by awakening our Chakras.

I felt fascinated with Chakra Meditation and Kundalini Yog, as somehow, this is the most scientific and processed form of a ritualistic meditation. It’s not just about making your mind blank, it is about enriching your mind/soul. It works on body, mind and soul simultaneously.

There are 7 Chakras, 6 in our body and 7^th on our outer body, just crowning us on top.

Muladhar – Base chakra, or Root Chakra is at the end of our spine. Its representing color is Red and Mantra is Lam. In senses it represents smell. It’s element is Earth. How apt is that when we say – come back to earth, put your foot down, to touch your roots; what we actually means is to be stable and secure, to become grounded; and all these take us to our root which is earth, our Muladhar, our base. This is the Chakra of stability, of the first step. We start from earth. This is our base.

Svadhishthana – This Chakra represents reproductive organs, and our emotions. Water is its element. Water which also represents emotions, feelings, and reproduction. Have you noticed how much watery terms when it comes to our reproductive organs, like flow, blockage, pipes, swimmers, etc… In senses it represents taste. It’s color is orange and Mantra is Vam. Water over Earth.

Manipura – It is the fire element, and quite suitably denotes our digestive system. This fire is used to digest our food, to burn it. Fire over water. Yellow is its color and Ram is its mantra. Sense is sight. It governs fear, power, and anxiety etc. Butterflies in stomach, feeling sick in stomach… we say all these things when we are anxious or scared.

Anahata – It is the Heart Chakra. It governs circulation, love, compassion, and well-being. All matters related to heart. Its color is green, and mantra is Yam. Sense is touch. Has anyone touched your heart? Its element is Air. Air over Fire. It is the most powerful chakra for emphats. Person with strong and awakened Heart chakra is full with love and compassion. It is one of the strong point in being an empath.

Vishuddha – This is throat chakra. Visuddha meaning pure. This chakra govern communication and expression. Its element is Ether. Ether is what this universe is made of. Our sound can not travel without this medium ether. Sound which is a part of communication, ruled by throat chakra. Its color is blue, mantra is Ham, and sense is hearing.

These were 5 chakras with elements of Earth, Water, Fire, Air and Ether. 5 elements. Our body is made of these 5 elements, 5 matters. These are those 5 matters. Now, what resides over matter.

Mind.

Mind over matter.

Ajna – Aagyaa, or gyan chakra. This is our 6^th Chakra. Our mind. Mind over all the matter. It is above all the physical elements. Our mind can go beyond this Ether filled universe. Its color is violet, or indigo. Its mantra is OM. It is also called as third eye chakra. It govern intuition. Clarity. Knowledge. Our consciousness. The sixth sense. This is our 6^th Chakra giving us 6^th sense. This is our inner voice. Its sense is insight.

Sahasrara – thousand petals chakra, also known as Crown chakra is at the crown of our head. It is not inside our body but rather just on the top, where our aura is. This is the final destination of Kundalini shakti, where she unites with her Shiva. Shining like millions of sun put together. The perfect union of Shiva-Shakti. Perfect Yog. This is the place of pure bliss. Enlightenment. Samaadhi. This is where our higher spiritual self resides. To reach there is attainment of Moksha. To attain pure knowledge. To know all. To be all. To be The One. Where there is no difference in body, mind and soul. It’s just a single point. Nothing matters. You are one. Shiva is one with her Shakti. Yog.

This is Yog for me.