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Thanks or Sorry… Choose your day

Thanks or Sorry
Thanks or Sorry

 

“Abra Ka Dabra” or “Gili Gili Choo”, magicians would say something like this and magically a handkerchief would transformed into a beautiful pigeon. Magic!!!

I have tried saying those magic words, so many times, but not even once I am able to turn any of my hankies to a bird or even to a cleaner hanky. 😦

But, there are some magic words, not to put a lifeless thing to life, but rather turn a sorrow to a smile or a frown into compassion(Vice Versa too) . “Thanks” and “Sorry” are these magic words.

Thanks or Sorry
Thanks or Sorry

Today celebrations are going on for Thanksgiving day. I am seeing the grand Thanksgiving parade (not in downtown 😦 but, on TV). Showing all my favorite cartoon characters, beautifully choreographed dances and live songs, big balloons and vibrating atmosphere. Loving it. Kind of reminds me of Republic Parade of India gone wild. 🙂

Thanks or Sorry
Thanks or Sorry

Thanksgiving is a harvest festival celebrated to say thanks for the harvest season, for the food that we are blessed with. Coming to think of it, in India, almost every festival is centered around the basic theme of harvest. Be it Hindu Calendar‘s new year, Makar Sakranti, Holi, Pongal, Onam, Ugadi or Bihu…. so many of them.

Coming back to the Thanksgiving day, my curiosity took me to thinking, what would a Happy Sorrygiving day would look like? Interesting, right!!!

Thanks or Sorry
Thanks or Sorry

Just imagine a day when whole extended family is sitting on a big dining table, came together to say sorry to each other for each hurtful actions that they have done. This time, no one wants to go first. Everyone is waiting for others to start. Just then, grandpa stands up and says ”Sorry son, but I have changed my will, and now after my death, all my money is going to my twenty year old girlfriend.

Grandma‘s turn “oh dear… how should I say, but dear daughter in law, I have never liked you. I am sorry, but you are so ugly. I mean, just look at my son and you….

Kid’s turn – “Dad and Mom, I am sorry, but I don’t feel sorry for any of my action. Go, shoot me.”

Thanks or Sorry
Thanks or Sorry

Father’s turn – “Dear wife, I am sorry. But, I think I am gay and I want a divorce. I am now in love with my best friend Gary, soon we will marry.

Mother’s turn – “I am sorry hubby. But, Gary is not gay. In fact, our kid is actually, his kid.

A loud thunder and lightning. God’s voice is heardI am sorry, guys. But, your time is over. Come back, all of you.

Thanks or Sorry
Thanks or Sorry

Hmmn….Doesn’t look like a good idea to me, to celebrate this Sorrygiving day. Lets, focus only on Thanksgiving.

Thanks or Sorry
Thanks or Sorry

On that note, I would like to thank every one who has motivated me and inspired me in my life, my family, my friends, my critics, enemies and above all my dear humorous and fun-loving God. Thanks. Keep smiling 🙂

 

How America is treating me….

How America is treating me
How America is treating me

 

I have spent almost half a year in America, and to think of it, it looks like just yesterday, when I landed here.

It was not my dream to come here, yes I am being honest. I have passed on many such opportunities, when I was offered to go to another country for work related assignments. Reasons for not doing so were always personal. Never wanted to leave the people I loved behind. To be frank there is no point in going anywhere, be it the best place on earth, if you don’t have the company of your loved ones.

But, this time was different. I am here with my family, and this is what matters.

 We all have some preconceived notions about the foreign countries and the people there. I had some too. Western country meant western influences, fast paced busy lifestyle, no family values, less warmth in relations, racism, no respect for elders and blah blah…. It’s a general notion about western countries, that we people from east of the world has. At least I had. Partially have to blame Manoj Bharat Kumar, for making films like Purab aur Paschim”, etc…. (You can blame anything on media J )

 So, I was talking about the preconceived notions. Some of them I feared seems coming true, when I saw the stiff crew of British Airways. Very British. But, that was just the flight or maybe my disturbed sleep in the long flight.

As soon as we changed to American Airlines, we felt the warmth of smiles around us. Since then, I have happy and smiling faces around me. Coming from a country that boast of its friendly culture, I was surprised to see that Americans seems to be much friendlier. Wherever we are, on the road, in a mall, gym, pool, just anywhere, passerby strangers were greeting us with a short Hi and a broad smile. It does feel welcomed, when people are so gracious.

They are not only courteous but helpful too. From our hotel staff who cleaned our room numerous times (courtesy my three messy kids), with a smile on their face. A friend who despite our first meeting helped us out, and drove us to our hotel when we didn’t find any taxi. She even called her daughter, who was actually sleeping peacefully in her home at that time, to help us. Our neighbor, who volunteered to help us in moving our furniture. The gorgeous ladies in the pool, who helped me in my swimming lessons. Even helped me with one of the swim supports and water goggles. Staff at the gym nursery, who look after my kids, changing them, feeding them, singing and playing with them. My old neighbor who gave a parting gift, a beautiful dressing table, to my daughter Tisha. Everyone that I have met here, seems like a friend.

Recently, one of my friend shared her ordeal. She belonged to south of India and thus had hard time making friends here in USA with the north Indians, Punjabis and Gujaratis living here. She told me that non Indians are more friendlier to her then we people who discriminate based on caste and color. It’s sad but true. I could never have realized it, If I won’t have left my country and came to a foreign land, to experience a new culture. 

Another thing that I have noticed, is the ease with which you can be just yourself without ever bothering about what others would think of you. Being a girl, I feel good when no one is ogling at me, no matter what I am wearing. I can walk without any passerby making lewd comments at me, or trying to disrobe me with their eyes. It’s a good feeling. Good to feel respected as a girl.

It feels good when people hold doors for you and your kids, even when you have never seen them before. Good to see cars driving slow in the neighborhood. Or people in cars stopping for pedestrians to cross the road, waiting patiently, smiling and waving a friendly hello. Feels good when people ask you, if you gave candies to your kids, before actually sharing them with kids. Feels good, when your neighbors greets every time they saw you, but never impose themselves or intrude in your household matters.

There are so many small things which have made my stay here, wonderful. Surprisingly, most of them had nothing to do with where I am, but with whom I am.

It could be that I have met only good people here or maybe people are really good here, but I am surrounded by nice souls and I am happy about it.  🙂

About, my preconceived notions. Well, now I don’t prefer to go by any kind of notion, am just trying to have my own experiences

How America is treating me
How America is treating me

 

Mindless Conversations of My Mind

Mindless Conversations of My Mind
Mindless Conversations of My Mind

Have you ever wondered about all the silly conversations that you have with yourself? I do.

Me trying to sleep, in the hustle of random thoughts going on in my mind. Me and my Mind 

Me: Am I spending too much time on Facebook?

Mind: Noooo, I don’t think so. It was just for ten minutes.

Me: Ten minutes or more. It was more than ten minutes.

Mind: Well, maybe fifteen but not more than that. Plus think of all the friends and family members, you stay in touch with.

Me: Yeah, you are right. I wished a friend for his anniversary, another one for birthday. God, how much they have changed since their marriage.

Mind: Time flies.

Me: But, they are changed, a lot. Hmmn… have I changed?

Mind: Nooooo, I don’t think so. Still the same.

Me: No, I think I have changed.

Mind: Well, maybe a little. But, it’s for good.

Me: Yeah, you are right.

Mind: Time flies.

Me: How much time have passed? Years and months? ….. Why I am not good with dates and years?

Mind: Not at all good with dates. Can’t remember them.

Me: That’s why my history was so weak. How difficult that time was? Why teachers expects from us to remember all those crazy dates? Who cares?

Mind: Remember social study teacher?

Me: Yeah, what was her name?

Mind: Ohhh… I forgot. But, she was so sad and old.

Me: Hmmn… I saw her crying once, in staff room.

Mind: What was she crying for?

Me: Maybe, because of us. We were so bad. None of us paid any attention in her class.

Mind: Hmm… but she was so sad. Sad and boring.

Me: I don’t like boring.

Mind: Hmmn…

Me: I must sleep. Babies are sleeping.

Mind: Remember last week at doctor’s office.

Me: What?

Mind: When office assistant asked you about  Renne’s date of birth?

Me: Yeah… I forgot. I mean, not forgot… forgot. But, yeah, I was completely blank for a minute.

Mind: Then you told her, he is twin to Otu. Both have same date.

Me: She was not looking for this answer. What she must have thought of me?

Me: Am I losing my memory?or my Mind?

Mind: Noooo…… you are fine.

Me: Hmmn… I am raising three kids. I think, I am allowed to go nuts, once in a while.

Mind: Maybe. But you are fine. Go to sleep.

Me: Hmmn… I think I should sleep.

Mind: ………..

Me: or maybe, I should read a book. Where did I kept it?

Mind: It’s on kitchen top.

Me: What’s it doing in kitchen?

Mind: I don’t know….. go get it.

Me: No, I don’t want to go. I am sleeping.

Mind: OK.

Mindless Conversations of My Mind
Mindless Conversations of My Mind

 

Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship: Who is using whom?

Boss & Employee Sexual Relationship
Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship

Indian media is going frenzy with the allegations pressed against the “TehelkaMagazine editorTarun Tejpal”, of sexually harassing a junior journalist. It is shocking to see a renowned media person involved in such a crime, but more shocking is his statement I feel atonement cannot be just words. I must do the penance that lacerates me. I am therefore offering to recuse myself from the editorship of Tehelka, and from the Tehelka office, for the next six months.”. Read full letter here.

Is this enough? I don’t think so, moreover who is he to decide what punishment he should get? I am quite miffed by this incident, but intent of writing this post is not to talk about this case. Intent is to share my thoughts on the Boss and Employee relationship; relationship that is more than just office work.

 Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship

Men and women working in an organization together is pretty common, more common is the healthy flirting that goes on between them in the office environment. I am calling it healthy, because this could be a way to break that sexual barrier/tension between the two sexes. But where to draw the line?

Answer to this is not very simple. It actually varies from person to person. Depends totally on the how the other one is going to perceive your gesture. But it’s never a good idea when the two person involved are Boss & Employee or Senior and Junior. If one of them has the power to influence the appraisal or work assignments of the other one, than they should not be, more than the friendly coworker.

Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship
Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship

Having worked in major organizations for more than seven years, I have witnessed few of such incidents. One that I would like to cite here, is that of a manager who was giving some extra attention to a female employee working two ranks lower than him. It came in notice when that female employee got promoted way before her scheduled time, even when she was not working on any active projects. Manager got sacked, and girl got promoted, again.

Sometimes it’s the other way round too. I have seen many girls, specially in IT field, who are surviving in the industry not because of their knowledge but because of their other skills. One senior manager once asked me to give good ratings to a girl working under me. I objected, as she used to spend more time in coffee breaks and arranging parties in office, than in completing her assigned work. The girl was positioned under another team leader, the very next day. A cute smile, a gentle pat and a little twinkle in your eyes can get you a long way. Long long way…. 🙂

Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship
Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship

To share a funny incident, once I have seen a guy, helping a girl in distress by trying to write a Java software code for her. Funny thing was, he didn’t even knew what Java was. He couldn’t complete her work, but he did manage to sit with her for half the day. What did the girl get? She managed to get the attention of her team leader, who than sat with her for other half of the day, to complete her work.

 Boss and Employee Sexual Relationship

On that note, keep enjoying your working environment because some girls have knowledge and talent; some boys have the strength of character.

9 things you may not know about me….

9 things you may not know about me....(I am second from left in the bottom row, only girl wearing full length leggings)

 

Here are the 10 Things that you may not know about me.

  1. I used to be a nerd during my school days. Just don’t have glasses on my eyes, but I was always immersed in my books. I had very few school friends, and I am not in touch with almost anyone from my school days.

  2. My family once thought that I got kidnapped or lost somewhere, and they searched the whole neighborhood. All this time, I was sleeping peacefully under the bed.

  3. I used to write a lot of poetry in my school days. No one has read my poems, still have them, but I don’t write anymore.

  4. When I was in my fourth standard, my father promised me a bicycle, if I would come first in my class. I achieved that, and since then I was always among toppers. I am very stubborn when I want something. I have gone to great lengths to get what I wanted, and still do so.

  5. My friends in my college life are very precious to me, they are the ones who introduced me to my social side. My teachers used to call me a chatterbox in college. I was friendlier to everyone and now I am in touch with almost all of them.

  6. My father has always been my  idol and my inspiration. I always wanted to be like him, but when I gave birth to my kids and started raising them, I realized that I am actually a carbon copy of my mother. However, this realization came very late in my life.

  7. I have always loved myself. Every bit of it. I like to put myself first then others. Mantra of my life is – If I am not happy, I can not make you happy. Maybe that’s why I have never had any regrets in my life.

  8. Biggest turn on for me: intelligent conversation, wholeheartedly laugh and good sense of humor. Biggest turn off: fake laugh, too much pleasing nature, self praise.

  9. I don’t like girly girls. I don’t like makeup. Don’t like over dramatic and fake people. I like girls who are self-dependent ( does not mean financially, but emotionally and physically too), girls who are ambitious and practical too. Girls with identity of their own.

  10. Out of all the statements, one is not true. I would like to keep some of my secrets from the world.   🙂